There are few things in this world that I hate, even though my mom always told me not to hate anything.

“You can dislike someone or something, but you should never hate,” she would say.

But I think even Mom can understand that I hate the Missouri Tigers. I’m a Jayhawk. I grew up a Jayhawk. I’m proud of the fact. If I was writing my bio, the fact that I’m a University of Kansas grad would make it in one of the first couple sentences.

And see, we Jayhawks, we hate the Missouri Tigers. And, it’s OK, because they hate us too. We don’t respect each other, but we respect the fact that we hate each other.

If you want a history lesson, this all goes back to the civil war, when the people fighting for Missouri set our town on fire.

And fast forward to today, and many Missouri people are proud of that. They’re proud that even though what the Jayhawkers in Lawrence represented – antislavery, a noble proposition – the pro-slavery folk in Missouri burned our town down. They even made a T-shirt a couple years back to celebrate the fact.

In my hometown of Kansas City, the KU grads and the MU grads coexist. When it’s not game day, we tolerate each other for the most part. I’ve even met a couple Tigers, my Uncle Ronnie’s nephews, who I like quite well.

But I could never consider an MU grad as one of my closest friends. It just wouldn’t work. And I could never, ever, ever, evaaaah consider an MU grad to be my significant other. I even addressed this in my farewell column for the University newspaper in college, a list of do’s and don’ts for my fellow graduates. 

I could be with a girl from another school, just not MU. I’ve never even given thought to what I would do if I caught the eye of a Mizzou grad, or vice versa – until last week.

I was out with my buddy Jake at a bar in downtown Kansas City. I was sitting at a table, relaxing and drinking a beer when a young lady came up behind me, put her arm around me and pressed up against my body.

“Well, hello,” I said, caught by surprise.

I started talking to the girl and her friend, not because I’m looking for a lady (I’m not), but because I wasn’t going to turn down an opportunity to be the ultimate wingman.

So I called Jake over and we all began a conversation.

As we were chitchatting, the friend noticed that Jake was wearing a Chicago shirt (he just moved back from Chicago), and she took this chance to talk trash on the Cubs, which I was totally OK with because I can’t stand the Cubs. Then she revealed that she was a Cardinals fan, which I was not OK with. I also don’t like the Cardinals, but it’s not a deal-breaker. One of my best friends is also a Cardinals fan and also a Jayhawk, so he totally redeems himself.

BUT these girls were not Jayhawks. They revealed that they were University of Missouri graduates. Obviously, this was not OK. I was not going to stand by and continue to let these girls try to hit on us. If there was a guide for wingmen, this would be the section where it’s addressed that there’s a time to be the anti-wingman.

So I did what I would like to think any KU grad would do in my position. I stood up, I put my arm around Jake, Jake put his arm around his friend Brian, another KU grad, and we sang the Alma Mater.

The Alma Mater is a special song for me. During orientation before my freshman year, all of the freshmen-to-be and their parents gathered in the Union. At the end of the orientation, they had us stand up and taught us the Alma Mater. As we sang, I looked over at my mom and she was crying.

The song reminded her of her days at KU, and right then I knew how much that song meant. Every time I would sing that song, it would make me proud to be a KU student. And now, just like my mom, I’m proud to be a KU alum. And while it doesn’t bring tears, it usually brings goosebumps.

And for the ladies from Mizzou, that song evokes a whole different feeling. They hate that song and they especially hate what follows: the Rock Chalk chant.

So when we started singing the other night, the MU girls immediately got up, walked away and flipped us off.

Typical Tigers.

4 Responses to “Hail to old KU”

1. Ann Thompson Says:
   July 29th, 2009 at 10:17 am

   Hey now CJ, that same can be said about KU fans to MU fans (flipping and such). Being a born and raised MU fan in Johnson County I can attest to that. But I agree with your mom, dislike us but don’t hate us. Go Mizzou!!!

2. Matt Wilkerson Says:
   July 29th, 2009 at 3:12 pm

   I was born and raised in MO, but went to KU… Having been around MU fans for most of my life, I can honestly say they are the most ignorant fan base in all of sports… it’s kind of sad actually. You can meet a normal, intelligent, mostly rational person in missouri… but as soon as you start talking about MU or KU athletics, they instantly become brain dead.

3. Kathleen Ingraham Says:
   July 29th, 2009 at 3:39 pm

   Loved it…Rock Chalk!

4. Eddie Davalos Says:
   August 8th, 2009 at 8:51 am

   CJ, That was very well written. I have passed your words to my 9 & 11 year old Los Angeles nephews who have been exposed to our little Jayhawk since birth. I hope this helps them understand just a little of what’s here.
   Eddie Davalos
   Lawrence, Kansas

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